


The Self-Insert That Changed Our Lives

by SlytherinHowl



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - School, Awkward Romance, Characters Writing Fanfiction, Crack, F/F, Fanfiction of Fanfiction, Humor, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Self-Insert of sorts, fanfictions for the win, inspired by a teacher who's writing fanfic with her students, out of character on purpose, stavos is just a joke, the ages are messed up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-03 05:57:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16320410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlytherinHowl/pseuds/SlytherinHowl
Summary: An AU fanfic about teenage Game of Thrones characters writing Game of Thrones fanfic, because why not?





	1. Fanfics are intellectually stimulating

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! First of all, this story makes no sense to me, but I just had to write it or it wouldn't leave me alone. Second of all, as a teacher in training, I'm sure as hell to have my students write fanfic when I really start teaching. Third, I've played around with the characters ages, I don't think it's really relevant to the story, but so that you must know, all of the teachers are at least over 30 and the students are under 20. Last, English is not my native language and this work has not been beta read, so I apologise for any mistakes. Without further ado, I hope you enjoy!

Jorah woke up on the first day of the new school year feeling kind of well-rested. Even though he _shouldn’t_ have gone drinking with Tyrion the previous night, he was proud of himself for not going over the top. He didn’t want to be a hungover mess on the first day. His colleagues may not mind, but he did because he had a reputation to keep (and Daenerys Targaryen in the English department to impress. Jorah knows she is far out of his league, but he could at least try). The history teacher went about his morning routine wondering which of his workmates would be up thanks to ungodly amounts of red bull and paracetamol. No wonder why Blackwater Secondary School is a fucking mess.  
He took his usual cycling route to work, even racing one of his sixth-years to the school. He and the boy exchanged friendly pats on the back upon arriving, and Jorah panted his way to the staffroom before Robert’s yearly ‘welcome-back-bitches’ speech. 

“You look like death warmed up,” was the first thing Daenerys said to him when he got to his destination. She has the incredible ability to turn his brains into goo. Daenerys is intelligent, accomplished, strong, gentle-hearted and ridiculously pretty. _And_ she is one of his best friends, which makes Jorah super aware of the fact that he shouldn’t imagine himself fucking his best friend against a blackboard.

“So do you, Targaryen,” of course she didn’t, but he couldn’t help teasing her back. Telling her that she looks wonderful as always is like confessing that he likes her, and you never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an idiot. Or so he thinks. Men are so complicated.

“No I don’t! I didn’t even drink that much yesterday. Melisandre is much worse,” she pouted in that way that makes him want to kiss her silly.

“I saw you reaching for that third tequila shot before I left. How many more did you take?”

“You’d know if you hadn’t left so early. You are so boring, Mormont,” he was going to answer, but Robert Baratheon staggered into the room with a reproachful Ned Stark at his heels. That whole school was still standing entirely due to Ned’s work as deputy headmaster, because in between Robert’s cluelessness as to what on earth he’s supposed to do as a headmaster and Tywin fucking Lannister’s dictatorial decisions in the school board, Ned is the only one who’s trying to keep everything from collapsing. He knows that challenging the Lannisters so openly will, at some point, come back to bite him in the arse, but he is an honourable man who won’t go down without a fight. People admire him for it, even Jorah, who never had a good relationship with Stark. 

“What a pathetic lot you are!” shouted Robert, arms stretched wide and a jolly, drunkish expression in his face. “Drinking before the first day of the term, tsk, tsk, tsk. Even you, Stannis! I thought you were the responsible Baratheon!” a red-faced Stannis of the Maths department desperately tried to sink into his chair and disappear from sight. Robert’s blabber elicited some groans and glares from the people in the room until he realised they were running late for the 8:30 AM classes. 

“OK, if anyone asks why you all look like shit, just say that you got salmonella during a dinner party at my place. Everybody’s got salmonella now.” 

“More likely for us to get syphilis at Robert’s place,” Jorah whispered in Daenerys’s ear, making her choke on her tea. 

The teachers then proceeded to their classrooms with the same excitement of the students (none), but for Jorah at least the morning wasn’t all that bad. His seventh-years are one of the best groups he’s ever taught, something that most of his colleagues agree on. By lunchtime, he managed to sit with Daenerys and Barristan Selmy of Geography. The trio soon started discussing their syllabuses and plans for the school year. Daenerys seemed to have some big things in mind.

“Years 5 and 6 will be the same as last year. I’m gonna work with academic writing and debates, especially with the sixth-years, they need to learn to express their ideas with a bit of formality,” Jorah and Barristan nodded emphatically, “but I’m gonna try something different with Year 7. Those kids are brilliant. I know I’m supposed to teach them to prepare for university, but with the way they write, they’ll all get into Uni without breaking a sweat. They’re more articulate than most post-grad students I’ve come across. But I’ve noticed they are scared of showing their individual talents. I’m not kidding, they sound like me most of the time, even when expressing their own thoughts on a subject, and I don’t want that! I want them to be independent, singular people, so I’m thinking of focusing on creative writing, at least for the first term.”

“Creative writing of what kind?” Barristan asked. Both men were quite impressed with Daenerys’ reasons. She blushed visibly before answering.

“Well, last year we had a brief but interesting discussion about fanfictions. They are keen on the subject, and so is my fifteen-year-old self. I think it is a genre that has a lot of potential, since it validates their own universe; it connects people and encourages them to write and improve. So, yes, I’m going to start with fanfictions, and maybe later move on to other genres. I’ve got high hopes. It’s gonna be great!”

“I’m sure it will, Khaleesi,” Jorah said, wrapping his arm around Daenerys’ shoulders.

“Don’t call me that. My ex called me that. It’s embarrassing,” she complained half-heartedly, but still hid her face in Jorah’s neck. Barristan shook his head slightly, but Jorah pretended he didn’t see his colleague’s disapproval.

Daenerys did exactly what she told the men she would do when she had her first class with her Year Sevens on Tuesday. The kids tried very hard to hide their excitement – even Joffrey, who is usually too much of a whiny little bitch to be pleased about anything – but failed miserably. She was virtually shouting to catch back the attention of the students, who were chatting animatedly and showing things on their phones to their friends.

“I know you can’t wait to write about BTS or Harry Potter or whatever it is that you like, but it’s not all fun and games, alright? I’ll still ask you to write plenty of critical essays and classical ‘school stuff’, as Ramsay just put it, otherwise, Tywin Lannister and the board will have my head on a plate,” there was some complaining, but eventually everyone agreed it was for the best.

It was. Daenerys was amazed at how her students threw themselves into the task of analysing and contextualising their source materials. They understood what they were writing about, which made the process even more interesting. The best part, however, was seeing each and every one of her students in their stories. Sansa’s emotionally charged dialogues, Margaery’s flowery style, Joffrey’s vicious language: they were all blooming before Daenerys’ eyes, even Podrick, who had never had a way with words. The young man grinned for the rest of one particular class after being told that his take on Batman was just as visceral and morally grey as you would expect from the character. Daenerys was proud of her work, and so was Jorah. Nothing could go wrong. 

 

 


	2. Fanfics are problematic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Just to make clear, I couldn’t really have characters such as Ramsay beiong completely psychotic in this story, so yeah, Joffrey and him are very ooc. I believe Jorah and Dany are too, but I’m not as worried about them, maybe because they’re based more on Emilia Clarke and Iain Glen than on the actual characters. That being said, I hope you enjoy!

Actually, _everything_ could go wrong.

On a morning in mid-November, Jorah noticed a huge commotion in one of the halls. He pushed his way past the students to find Joffrey Baratheon throwing one of his tantrums.

“HOW COULD SHE WRITE THIS ABOUT ME? I’M GONNA KILL WHOEVER WROTE THIS STUPID STORY! I HATE FANFICTIONS, I HATE ENGLISH, I HATE THE TARGARYEN GIRL, I HATE YOU ALL!”

“Oi, Joffrey, shut the fuck up, she wrote me as a psycho. I mean, I know everyone is afraid of me, but I’m not a psycho!” Ramsay complained, but his eyes shone with mirth.

“It’s the smile, Ram. You have a psycho smile. And an unnerving interest for medieval torture,” Myranda chirped in, messing with her boyfriend’s hair.

“Sansa, what happened?” Jorah asked the laughing redhead.

“Oh, Mr. Mormont, someone wrote a Game of Thrones fanfic with us as the characters, and Joffrey is cross because his character is a wuss – I know it’s not a nice word, sir, but it’s true, you know it is, and I wish my thirteen year-old self knew it too – you and Ms. Targaryen are in it! It’s very well written, although I think most people won’t be very pleased with it,” she explained, wiping her eyes and grinning at her friend Margaery.

It turns out that the mysterious writer had printed copies of some chapters and left them in the school halls, so it was easy for Jorah to confiscate one of them and take it to the staffroom. He thought it was strange, given that it would be much easier to publish such a story online, but decided not to question it. Maybe it was a dare, or just someone in want of attention. Either way, there were worse ways of getting attention, right? Surely a silly fanfic wouldn’t do any harm-

“Whoa, what the actual fuck was that?” He exclaimed as his eyes scanned a part in which his ‘colleague’ Melisandre dropped her clothes to the floor and gave birth to a shadow monster. Conceived with the help of Stannis. Jorah was sure that they would be livid when they found out. He couldn’t believe someone in the school, most likely a _student_ , had written that.

“Jorah!” Daenerys’ voice woke him from his daze, “Gimme that!” She ripped the stack of papers from his hand in a frantic move.

“Wait, do you know what this is?” He asked, slightly confused.

“Arya Stark spent my entire class today going on and on about this. From what she said, this thing is just as fucked up as its source material, which would be okay, if the characters in question weren’t you and me and the fucking _headmaster_.Do you see the problem?” she said exasperatedly, going through the pages and shaking her head in disbelief, “Tywin Lannister has been looking for a reason to fire me for three years, if he sees this he won’t need to look anymore,” Jorah didn’t know what to do, so he simply wrapped his arms around her shoulders and let her sink into his embrace.

“But this has nothing to do with you or your project, Dany. This isn’t one the assignments, right?” she shook her head and groaned, “Then he can’t blame you for it!”

“He can do whatever he wants, Jorah. It doesn’t matter if this fanfic is connected to me or not, he’ll use it as proof that I’m reckless, unprofessional and unsuited for this job. Or maybe something worse. Either way, I’m screwed,” he held her for another moment, rubbing circles on her back and wishing that he could help his friend.

Soon the whole school knew about the bloody story. The students were absolutely thrilled, talking about it non-stop. The teachers, on the other hand, were quite furious, with the exception of Davos, who found it hilarious. It would have been glorious to see a seething Cersei Lannister in any other situation, but Daenerys knew that the older woman’s anger was directed at her. Other chapters came up in December, and what was already bad got completely out of hand. Daenerys got called to a board meeting two weeks before Christmas break, and even though she knew what was coming, it didn’t stop her from feeling like she’d just been hit by a train. Jorah felt his chest tighten when he saw her come out of the office red-eyed and shaking. He wanted to cover he face with kisses and cuddle her until she felt better, but knowing that he shouldn’t, especially in that delicate situation, he simply held her hands in his.

“So,” she said with false cheerfulness, “It appears that my New-Year’s resolutions will include finding a new job.”

“C’mon, let’s get out of here,” Jorah said, tugging at her sleeves. He couldn’t do anything, but he could comfort her a bit. At the very least, he could take her to a pub and help her drink her sorrows away, which isn’t exactly the best solution to life’s problems, but that’s what they did, anyway.

However, news in Blackwater School travel exceedingly fast. In two days, the entire school knew of the board’s decision to fire Daenerys over the ‘fanfiction scandal’, and the students (especially the seventh-years) were displeased with it. Five days before Christmas, a petition for her to remain as a teacher there was issued and signed by the great majority on the student body and by most of the teachers as well. This overwhelming support had Daenerys fighting back tears in what was supposed to be her last class with Year 7. She suspected that one of them had written the goddamn fic, but she couldn’t really blame them nor complain about her characterization. Whoever it was turned her into a powerful dragon princess, and in spite of the tears and the uncertainty of her future, the hugs and words of encouragement from her pupils made her feel a bit like that. She was proud to have given her kids wings to fly with, and overjoyed that they did the same to her.

Still, Jorah was unsure if the student’s efforts would have any results, so he gathered some courage on the last day before the break and sat down with Robert and Ned to try to convince them to change the board’s mind, however much it stung his pride to beg to Ned Stark. To Jorah’s absolute surprise, the pair seemed to listen to his plea (even though he believes someone more powerful than him may have intervened), and Robert stood up to Tywin Lannister (and therefore to his own perverse wife), as a headmaster ought to. Jorah was delighted and a bit proud to receive a call from Daenerys on New Year’s Eve saying that she hadn’t been fired after all.


	3. Fanfics Change People

Of course, things were going to change, much to Daenerys’ chagrin. She hates being told what do teach her students, but she also hates being fired over small things, so she swallowed her pride and accepted the board’s ‘recommendations’ to go back to the original syllabus (or else). That did not stop a certain ‘The Squire’ from publishing other chapters on a newly created Tumblr account, which included a slightly aggressive bio stating that “MS. TARGARYEN IS NOT INVOLVED WITH THIS PROJECT WHATSOEVER AND DOESN’T DESERVE TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR SOMETHING SHE DOESN’T ENDORSE. WHILE I DO UNDERSTAND THAT SOME PEOPLE MAY HAVE FELT UNCOMFORTABLE AND SHOCKED WITH THIS STORY, WHICH I APOLOGISE FOR, I MUST ALSO NOTE THAT THIS IS NOTHING BUT A SILLY JOKE. I HAVE THE UTMOST RESPECT FOR BOTH THE STAFF AND THE STUDENTS OF BLACKWATER SECONDARY SCHOOL. I DON’T MEAN ANY HARM WITH THIS. WITH THAT BEING SAID, I HOPE YOU ENJOY!” Needless to say, _@winteratblackwater_ was every student’s favourite account.

By the end of January, the board and the teachers finally stopped fighting against the damned fanfic and decided to let the students do whatever the hell they wanted. Jorah knew that deep down the initial indignation had worn off and most of his colleagues were growing curious with the story, even though they would never admit it. Jorah himself felt ashamed of himself for reading and liking it. He kept telling himself it was because the fic was compelling and had a great mix of show and ‘real life’ content, but honestly, he liked it because of Daenerys. Imagining her riding a dragon and just being generally powerful in beautiful flowing gowns did _things_ to him. Things he is not proud of. No wonder why this Squire girl wrote him as the knight who falls hard for his queen.

He tried to act as nonchalant about his characterization as he could, but the ‘Ser Friendzone’ jokes he heard here and there made him cringe. At least Daenerys had the grace of not commenting on it. He had no idea if she _didn’t_ know that the jokes weren’t just about his character or if she _did_ and was trying not to make things more embarrassing. He had always though he could conceal his feelings well, but he wasn’t so sure anymore.

Well, Jorah wasn’t the only one having to deal with the crescent interest for his fictional alter-ego. Tyrion Lannister and Petyr Baelish ended up joining Davos in embracing their characters. Jorah was slightly worried by that, since Baelish has an ego the size of a Brontosaurus, which only got bigger whenever his son of a bitch of a character devised a greater, more cunning plan to fuck shit up. And his flirting with Sansa was certainly getting out of hand, even if she jokingly flirted back. She is a student, for fuck’s sake! Baelish is a creepy arse who has no good intentions whatsoever, but Sansa, being a sweet, clever but somewhat naïve girl failed to see that (at least that’s what Jorah and Daenerys thought – Sansa had a bet with her sister Arya to see if she could have Baelish wrapped around her _littlefinger_ ). Poor Jon Snow was trying hard to: 1) find out how the hell the writer knew about his fiancée Ygritte and 2) make the kids understand that “I don’t ship myself with Daenerys or anyone because I am _engaged._ Daenerys teased him relentlessly for it. Their banter would have been amusing had Jorah’s jealousy not reared its ugly head in and spoiled the mood. The interaction between Stannis’ and Davos’ characters was _suggestive_ , at the very least, and Davos found it hilarious to constantly hug and touch a ‘protesting’ Stannis (Damn, they’d been secretly wanting each other for ages, so neither of them really minded a little harmless flirting. Still, the kids – or the school board – didn’t need to know that Davos’ jokes were more than just jokes). _Stavos_ was as much of a thing between the students as _Jonerys_ was.

But perhaps the one person who got affected the most was Brienne Tarth. The boxer-turned-P.E.-teacher spent her entire life hearing all sorts of mean comments about her body, and it wasn’t any different in the school, whoever much people like Daenerys tried to put an end to body shaming. “Big Brienne” or the shortened version “BB” were the most popular nicknames for the woman, although in three years Daenerys has given detention to at least eight different students for calling Brienne sexist and transphobic names. The P.E teacher tried her best to brush off said comments, but she didn’t always succeed. Jorah was genuinely concerned when he noticed that her character was a knight. He knew that many women would actually rather be portrayed as a badass, sword-swinging hero than as a damsel in distress, but he was pretty sure Brienne would _love_ not to be associated with masculinity just for fucking _once._

The worst part was that she couldn’t even pretend that she didn’t know what was going on, since her character was a favourite among the students. “Why is it that one day they call me names because of my masculine features and the next they’re cheering me on because of these exact same features?” Jorah heard her complain to Daenerys once. He was surprised to find out that none other than Margaery Tyrell joined her English teacher in the crusade to defend Brienne and change the student’s conceptions of masculinity and femininity. Sure, she gained lots of Instagram followers by adhering to the feminist movement, but her beauty blogger influence started bringing about some change to the school, to Brienne and even to the fanfic that started the whole thing.

Daenerys knew that the author, whoever he or she was (why must we assume that fanfic writers are always women?) did have a preference for Brienne and was trying to paint a nice picture of her, but he didn’t know how to. In the first chapters, she was all muscle and knightly honour and arse kicking, which didn’t really do her justice and displeased her. Brienne is extremely honourable, yes, and she could kick your arse, also yes, but she is a pacifist and hasn’t fought with anyone since leaving the rings years ago. She _should_ , though, because she’s had enough of people telling her she looks like a bloke. Daenerys was quick to start campaigning that her students _should not_ associate bravery, strength and fighting to men, and most importantly that they _must not_ shame women for possessing those traits, or only praise a woman because she acts like a man. The English teacher, with the aid of Margaery and her Instagram account, created a weekly ask named ‘sexist shit I heard today’, to which the kids could contribute. Daenerys noticed a few things after a while: many boys at the school started to slowly understand their own sexism, that the fanfic had taken a ‘as-feminist-as-possible-in-a-medieval-environment’ turn and that Brienne seemed significantly more comfortable with herself.

Daenerys once found her colleague smiling brightly at her phone for no apparent reason. The P.E. teacher hurried to show all of the other teachers what one of her students had sent her from _@winteratblackwater_ (which was accepting art submissions to illustrate the chapters): a drawing of her, dressed in blue tunic and cloak, a red rose attached to the fastening of her cape, her right hand resting on the pommel of her sword and her left holding a candle. Her short hair was shiny and she smiled brightly at the viewer. Below, a quote from the story: ‘ _She is a woman of fibre, yet all the same of tenderness. Brienne of Tarth has fierceness in her features, but forgiveness in her dark blue eyes. Her sword is as sharp as the thorns of the flowers she adores. Brienne is a creature of wavering light, like a candle lighting the way at night, one that can guide and protect you, should you prove yourself trustworthy, or slay you in a heartbeat should you not._ ’ This quote has been said by a character yet unmentioned, but who proved to be quite a surprise.

No one in the school knew exactly _why_ Jamie Lannister was part of the board, not even Robert, and he’s the bloody headmaster. The eldest Lannister brother is a lawyer who knows jack shit about education, but he is Tywin’s favourite child and got put on the school board for this very reason. Most people think he is a pretentious Ken doll just like his twin sister and honestly, they’re not entirely wrong. The students believe he is not as bad as Cersei, but whenever they see him, he is prancing about the halls with a smug smile on his face, so naturally, that was how he was portrayed in the fanfic, as a pedantic and morally ambiguous knight. At some point in the story, Jorah’s character mentioned that he beat Ser Jaime in a joust to impress the maiden he fell for, and Jorah was sure that one of the Seventh-Years was the mind behind that ridiculous thing. The ‘joust’s had been a pub fight he told his students about, one that happened way before Jorah knew that winning Lynesse over was actually a _horrible idea_. Wanna know what’s even more of a terrible idea? Telling your over-observant students details of your personal life, Mormont.

Well, back to Jaime, he may be a bit of an arse, but he was one of the few people to acknowledge straight away how good the story was. He loves medieval history, so unlike virtually everyone who ‘became characters’ in the fanfiction, Jaime was excited to see himself as a knight. What does Jamie have to do with Brienne? Nothing other than his character was vaguely based on a canon knight that does meet with this other character that inspired The Squire’s take on Brienne, so at some point Brienne of Tarth held Jaime Lannister captive. In the show, the duo developed a mutually respecting relationship, so it was only natural that their fanfictional counterparts would do the same. However, it wasn’t natural, because the author seemed to group his characters according to real life relationships and Jaime and Brienne had never talked to each other in their lives. Until one day Jaime decided to say hello to Brienne after a board meeting.

Brienne Tarth would only expect fucking Jaime Lannister to come talk to her if it was to insult her. What she did not expect him to do was launch into an excited talk about Templar Knights and the Dark Ages. She also did not expect him to be dyslexic, but super interested in reading about mythology of all cultures, but most importantly, she did not expect him to be quite nice after she scraped off his rude surface. No one knows why, but the two became good friends in a short amount of time. They would bicker a lot, but they got along surprisingly well. The Squire realised that, and made his characters share an even closer bond than in the show of the books. The students soon started shipping them, but there was nothing intrinsically romantic in their relationship, be it in the story or in real life. Maybe there could be a spark in the future, but as far as anyone was concerned, Jaime was happy to simply drag Brienne to conventions or to a Renaissance fair with him and force her into a suit of armour so she could sword fight him (she nearly hacked his head off when he tried to make her wear a medieval dress). Needless to say, he got his arse handed to him every time.

Feminism, having her students show her that the image she has of herself s not true at all, Jaime’s friendship and discovering the joys if waving a huge sword around did have a great impact on Brienne Tarth. Of all the things that happened at Blackwater Secondary School that year, this was the best of them.


	4. Fanfics Unite People

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the last chapter! Thank you for taking the time to read, it means a lot! This was quite fun to write, I hope ot was equally fun to read!

In between discussions, fan arts, speculation and waiting for new chapters of the story to be released, the rest of the year flew by everyone. One day in June, Daenerys was getting ready to leave her classroom when she was stopped by Podrick. The boy approached her nervously, getting his phone from his pocket and opening Tumblr. Without a word, he handed her his phone and she took it confusedly. Ok, _@winteratblackwater._ She’d seen that site many times, what was different about it that Podrick wanted to show her? It took her a while, but finally Daenerys realised that it was _his_ Tumblr. _Podrick_ was The Squire. _He_ was the mystery writer! When he noticed her mouth hanging agape, he spoke.

“I... I had been writing the story for quite some time, alone. One day I had to hand in an essay to Mr. Lannister and I got the date mixed up so I had to send it to him by email. Well, I was working on the story at the same time I was working on his essay, so I accidentally sent him the wrong file,” Podrick was red as a tomato by then, “I thought he would be offended but he wasn’t; he thought it was brilliant. He wanted to get back at Mr. Baratheon - Robert, Ms., but I think Stannis too- and at his sister, so he kind of struck a deal with me. He would write me letters of recommendation to every major university in Westeros if I printed a few chapters and scattered them around to see how pissed off people would be. It’s just that my timing was very bad, Ms. I’m so sorry I put you in that situation, you nearly got fired, and it was all my fault.” He finished lamely, not meeting Daenerys’ astonished eyes.

“Podrick, Tyrion blackmailed you! He used you! By the Seven, Pod, you could sue him!”

“But, Ms. Targaryen, I accepted the deal. He meant it as a joke when he said he would write me the letters, but I was excited, ‘cause I didn’t think I was gonna get into university, so at least I would have a chance.”

“That doesn’t excuse him! No, Pod, Tyrion is a little tosser who deserves the beating I’m gonna give him,” she said determinately, but her eyes softened and she took Podrick’s face in her hands, “I seriously doubt you would have any trouble getting accepted at KLU, for instance. You’re absolutely brilliant, my dear.”

“But my grades-“

“Do not determine who you are or will be. Sometimes Joffrey gets higher grades than you, right? Yet he is a little hooligan who gets himself into all sort of trouble and doesn’t have a police record yet because mummy and daddy bribe people to leave their baby boy alone! What about Ramsay? Smart kid, but completely off his rocker, Hannibal Lecter style. You know what, Pod, I’ll write you those letters, under the condition that you will study so very hard for your finals and you will ace them and prove to everybody and to yourself just how good you are. Deal?”

Podrick looked at his teacher with his lost-puppy eyes, but smiled and shook his head affirmatively. Daenerys smiled back at her pupil and embraced him tightly.

“Are you not mad at me? I... embarrassed you. I almost got you fired. I’m so sorry, Ms. Targaryen.”

“I’m not mad at you. Well, yes, you embarrassed me a bit, but it could have been worse. Jorah’s been awkward now that the whole school knows that he fancies me,” Daenerys smiled cheekily, but approvingly, “Considering that you departed significantly from both the show and the books, I think your characterisation is subtle. Maybe not with Cersei, but everyone hates her, anyway. Now come with me to the staffroom, let’s kick Tyrion’s arse together,” she said, taking his hand, but Podrick froze and looked at her, alarmed. 

“They’ll all know! Everyone will hate me if we tell!”

“Well, consider that as your punishment for causing such havoc in the school. Relax, Pod, Cersei will hate you, but the others won’t. They’ll thank you. Now come, don’t question the last dragon!”

The teachers were lounging in the staffroom, Robert Baratheon and Ned Stark there too, when Daenerys and Podrick entered. They all looked curiously at the blonde woman with a cryptic smile on her face and her arm around the student’s shoulders. Podrick suffled nervously, glancing at the English teacher, then at Tyrion, who, soon understanding why they were there, tried to vanish under the table, without success. The duo stood in the middle of the room and Daenerys’s smile widened.

“I wanna introduce you all to the famous _The Squire!_ ” her words were met with raised eyebrows and dumbfounded stares.

“Podrick wrote the story?”

“Bollocks, I thought it had been a girl!”

“How did you know about my fiancé?”

“How could you!”

“HEY, EVERYBODY SHUT UP!,” Daenerys shouted, “before you start throwing stones at him, you must know that Pod was coerced into making his story public by no other than Mr. Tyrion Lannister! If it wasn’t for him, none of what happened this year would have happened! Podrick wouldn’t be in such a delicate situation, I wouldn’t have gotten nearly fired, you, my dear colleagues, wouldn’t have been subject of speculation and gossip and shipping and whatnot,” she said, glaring at Tyrion, “if it wasn’t for him, our kids wouldn’t be writing and creating art pieces and reading and discussing things such as feminism, we wouldn’t be having the fun we had nor making the friends we made because of what our characters did, Pod wouldn’t be writing as spectacularly as he is. Say what you wish, he is a bloody genius. Good things came with ‘Winter at Blackwater’, more good things than bad things, if you must know. I only wish they came through Pod’s legit need to share his creation with the world and not through blackmailing, Tyrion!,” the teacher were, one by one, agreeing with Daenerys’ points and soon joined her in glaring at Tyrion.

“In my defense,” said the dwarf, looking at his feet like a guilty child, “I, for many times, told him he could stop posting the chapters. I even realised it was better for him to post them online, he would end up getting caught. Yes, it was a tasteless prank. Yes, I wanted to get on Cersei’s nerves, but I did no force him to write, its just... Daenerys, you know how good that story is, you know how much potential this boy has, it was a shame to see all that go to waste!,” he looked at her pleadingly.

“You could have valued Pod’s work in a way that didn’t get people nearly _fired_ ,” Daenerys did want to grab Tyrion by his collar and throw him out of the window.

“Well, but I saved you! I told Robert and Ned what was going on, they knew about the whole thing! Mormont over there talked to them too, but it was my doing! I wouldn’t let them fire you for something you had no involvement on!,” Daenerys looked first at Robert and Ned, who stood awkwardly on one corner, then at Jorah, who seemed absorbed in his paper-cup.  
“You knew about this?,” she asked the headmaster accusingly.

“I thought it was funny,” said Robert with a shrug.

“You too, Ned? And you said nothing?”

“What was I supposed to do, Daenerys? No one listens to me!”

Before they could keep arguing, Davos rose from his chair, both his hands on Stannis’ shoulders, and interrupted them.

“So, I must thank Podrick and Tyrion, then? Stannins asked me in marriage yesterday, and it is all because of you!,” the man laughed heartily and Stannins rolled his eyes and huffed out an annoyed breath, but did nothing to remove Davos’ hands from his frame. Soon the befuddlement that had taken over the staffroom was replaced with a sense of ridiculous amusement, and everyone started laughing about the situation (except Cersei, because she is a bitch).

“You killed me, mate. Not cool. You had Sansa plot my death and send Arya to kill me. Not cool!,” Baelish complained halfheartedly, his lips quirking up under his moustache.

Podrick was red faced again, but there were signs of a smile on his face. Some of the teachers were going through the blog, trying to find their favourite fan arts of themselves, Jon was repeating ‘you know nothing, Jon Snow’ in an accent even stronger than his, Jorah was still avoiding Daenerys’s eyes and Robert was joking loudly about the story, one arm around Podrick. Brienne came up to him, looking sternly at the boy.

“You know, I didn’t like that I was a knight at first,” the boy was ready to apologise profusely, but she cut him off, “but then... You made me powerful. You said some really nice things about me that no one had ever said before. I wanna thank you, Pod, really,” then he smiled for real, and so did she, “but don’t think you’re dismissed from P.E., Payne. In this last month I’m gonna have you doing push-ups until your arms fall off!”

Podrick was pleasantly surprised to find that the teacher didn’t punish him for his story, even though Tywin and Cersei Lannister wanted to (Jamie, the fic’s number one fan, stopped them). His fellow students too received the news that he was the writer super well, and whenever he appeared in the halls someone would come to talk to him, something that had never happened before. He published the very last chapters of his tale a week before the end of of the semester, which gave everyone a break from the finals. Daenerys really had to keep her tears at bay as she started reading them in the staffroom, especially during her last interaction with Jorah’s character.

_“The battle raged around him, but Ser Jorah could no longer fight. A stray arrow shot downwards and found its target between the knight’s left collarbone and his neck. Ser Jorah fell to his knees, his vision blurring as his life oozed out of his wound. He knew Daenerys was close by, atop her larger dragon, but could not see her. He would die a bittersweet death, serving his beloved queen, but never truly honoured by her. She had more urgent matters to worry about than mourning the death of a disgraced knight._

_He breathed heavily as dying men do and his eyes watered without his consent. He would die and she would not know; he would die and she would not care. He brought this on himself, surely, his betrayal of her forever separating the knight and his queen, who were once so close. The things left unsaid between them would remain unsaid, as there was nothing he could do to stop his soul from flying away. He could only hope that, should a world for the souls of the dead exist, she would forgive him there, when she passed away herself._

_The knight would have let go of his life had a pair of snowy white hands not held his face. **Daenerys**. He presence warmed his heart and made him fight just a little longer. Ser Jorah could hardly see, be he felt her rest her forehead against his and he used whatever little energy he still had to smile faintly. The dragon queen did cry for her dying knight as she kissed his cheeks and lips. She knew there was no escape for him, so she simply held his body, sheltered by her dragon’s powerful wings. The bittersweet feeling Ser Jorah felt was gone, replaced by peaceful gladness. The brave knight died in his love’s arms, content with his parting from her. But she cried harder as she parted from him and remounted her beast. Daenerys should be used to saying goodbye to him, but she never was.”_

The ending was... Bittersweet. The last battle against ice zombie things that had all characters fighting together was won, if you could call it a victory. Most of the characters died, and those who didn’t were left in despair. What was surprising, though, was that the story ended not in the battlefield, but with a father telling his son the stories of his youth. Samwell Tarly had been a student at Blackwater a few years prior and served and the narrator to the story, which had seemed to be a third person narrator all throughout the fic.

Jorah was alone in the staffroom one late afternoon, Tumblr still open on his phone, when Daenerys came in and sat opposite him. He was trying not to avoid her ever since his “fictional” infatuation got too obvious and was failing miserably. She smiled and handed him a cup of tea. He smiled back and drank it, not sure what to say.

“Have you read the last chapters?,” she asked, eyeing his phone.

“Just finished them.”

“They were quite sad. I, in fact, nearly cried when you died in my arms.”

“It wasn’t me. It was just a character,” Jorah didn’t want to admit that he, too, had been wiping tears away before she arrived.

“Don’t be so sour, Mormont. I know you were affected by that story as much as I was.”

“No, I didn’t,” he lied, “my character did things I would never do.”

“Like what?,” Jorah averted her inquisitive gaze and pondered a bit before he answered.

“Like betraying you.”

“My character did things I wouldn’t do either. Like banishing you, so heartless,” Daenerys was sure Jorah was blushing under his blonde beard, “how long have you fancied me, Jorah?”

“What are you talking about?,” he tried to keep his cool, but there were hints of defensiveness and desperation in his voice. Fuck, caught like a deer in headlights.

“I’m no fool. Answer me,” he looked at her, his brow furrowed, but said nothing, “answer me. Now!,” he was intimidated by her harsher tone, yet he opened and closed his mouth a few times before speaking.

“Since you started teaching here,” his head was spinning. _Congrats, mate, you made a fool of yourself in front of the woman you’re in love with. She’s gonna refuse you and you’ll lose a friend_ , was the only thing his mind was supplying him with.

“How old are you? I have the feeling that I should know,” he froze again after her question, and it took some waggling of her eyebrows to get him thinking again.

“Forty-six. Why?,” he didn’t want the question to sound too pressing, but it did.

“Just doing some maths. I have a personal rule that I won’t date anyone who’s over 15 years older than me. If I’m correct you are _exactly_ 15 years older than me,” she said as if talking about the weather, and he kept looking at her as if she grew a second head. _Would_ she give him a chance, then? Was that what she was trying to imply? He woke from his daze when she leaned on the table, her face much closer to his than it was before. He could kiss her. He could wait to see if she would kiss him. _Or_ he could waste his time overthinking and miss his shot, because Davos and Stannis entered the staffroom, _holding hands_. So they _were_ a couple! They grabbed their stuff and left without bothering the other occupants of the room, but when Jorah had noticed, she had risen from her chair and was gathering her things.

“Daenerys, I...”

“Wanna grab something to eat?”

“I... Would love to.”

“Come on, then,” she extended her hand and he took it, in a daze. They left the school hand in hand. Jorah would glance down at her all the time, airily, as if in a dream.

“Digest those butterflies, Mormont, or you won’t have any soace left for our food,” she said amusedly, glancing back at him. He awoke then, and realised he had wasted far too much time. He crashed his lips into her, right in the middle of the street, while everybody looked. She smiled into the kiss and embraced him, playing with his hair. In the distance, Margaery Tyrell was taking a billion pictures the couple and sending them on her class’ group chat.

“ONE MORE SHIP @Podrick UR THE BEST MATCHMAKER EVER.” Pod looked fondly at the pictures of his dear teachers kissing, but soon went back to the pages that were opened in his computer. Daenerys’ and Tyrion’s recommendation letters, his blog and his e-mail. An independent publishing house called Mhysa Books, owned by Daenerys’s school friend Missandei Naath, had just contacted him, showing great interest in his story and wanting to publish it, if he adapted it so that he wouldn’t infringe any copyright laws. He couldn’t believe it. Who knew that a self-insert fanfic could change so many lives.  



End file.
